Couldnt be more Aussie

A warm day. Lots of sun and a dry breeze.
Today I was a truckie.

Im in a place a long way from home. Most people have never heard of.
Out here, I fit in as a drop kick. Dirty hands. White singlet. Orange safety vest. Bacon and Egg McMuffin and a cold ice coffee.

Yeah, baby. I was a truckie.

I went to work with my brother. He is a Pink Lady.
All laughter aside, Ill address those who dont know what that is. Pink lady is a hygiene service. They travel to where ever someone has their product (Supermarket, Office, Pub, Restaurant, Public Park Toilet) and change the sanitry napkin bin, nappy bins, Sharps bin, soaps, air fresheners and so on.

He drives a smallish truck. A transit to be exact.

I helped him do his rounds today and I enjoyed it.

I know you are all probably thinking "how is touching THOSE bins fun? Thats just gross!"

Well, actually... it takes a lot to disgust me.
Especially smells. There are very few smells I cant handle.
Urine, fart, feces, 2 week old used tampons... yeh. Doesnt faze me. I couldnt care less.

Oh you know what i hate though? (Generally) Toilet Air fresheners you buy for your house. Dude, in my opinion a heap of a fat guys diarehhea would smell better. Seriously, I cant stand it.

ANYWAY!

So I found the job interesting. I mean, its toilet business! And I got a VIP access to see both worlds up close! Men and women!


For one - I mean, my brother being a ...man...he has problems with changing the female toilets and stuff. He has to knock, then annouce he is coming in and ask if anyone has an issue (which they usually do) and he has to then wait outside before going in to do his work.

And thats a bit of a hassle because there are about 7 girls on average in the toilets when he does the rounds.

...At 9:30am...

I mean, who has to piss that early? Or even take a dump for that matter. Isnt that a before work activity?

Sorry, Im getting sidetracked...so yeah...

Me being female I could do the female toilets without that stupid waiting. Which meant the job was done quicker.

And then I moved onto the mens. And men dont look at each other anyway so I really have no problem at all.

Now my most interesting fact for the day is about soap.

Now, soaps at your restrooms are changed every fortnight and the container inside the dispenser is about 500mL

In the female toilets, at the end of that fortnight, there is about one forth of that left in there. A very small amount really.

BUT IN THE MENS ROOM..

There was more than half still there. Probably about 2/3 still there on average. In some places, they didnt even need refilling.

IN TWO WEEKS, 1/3 OF THE SOAP IS USED!!!

My GOD is that gross or WHAT!


Um...after that I got left home alone which meant I got continue my drinking. After a couple of beers I went outside and chatted to the little kids across the road. It was apparent that Im not passing. Im getting too old. Lol.

The little girl (8 years old) said to me after I subtly refered to myself as male.

"You know... your kinda half girl and half a guy"

I wanted to get more out of what she meant. Like whether my voice was too high or it was my intonation but she couldnt put her finger on it.

The little boy though (12) just seemed to ignore any real gender thing. We talked martial arts, boxing, motorbikes, bikes, cars, weights and strength and so on..Then we did flips and wrestling moves on the trampoline. Man I havent been on one of those in about 9 years.

Yeah it kinda really set me back to when I was 12 and talking with my mates.

I was rather ...um.. not smashed but I was rather buzzed so I carried on a conversation with them like I would if I was their classmate (I usually have some uncomfortable barrier with kids.. but it seems beer takes that away).

yeh.. It kinda brought back memories. Scratched up some old wounds and what not. I felt the same kinda exhasperated feeling when talking to girls. It was like "I...I just dont have anything to say to you. You are from a different planet"

Yesterday at the trainstation I found a baby kitten. Its not more than 3 weeks old. Its kinda...ferral. I guess. A mungral of course.

But yeh, its kinda cute. Im not really a cat person. Im taking care of it. Feeding it. Flea bathing it and myself (damn fleas) and right now its asleep in my lap which means my tattered left hand gets a rest.

We dont know if its a boy or a girl so we cant find a name for it. I thought Marco would be alright. As in Marco Polo.

But also, Im probably gonna give it away so I really cant be bothered thinking up names and stuff for it.

Anyway, its because of this cat and the little kids next door that I felt a little... negatively nostalgic if that makes sense.

They called it "He-she" and "Girl-Boy" in conversation when the need for pronouns or direct gender referencing arose. And yeah, that made me feel really unhappy cause it reminded me of some of the names people called me.

On a brighter side, ive made endless pussy jokes.

And I thought while lacking a better name I should call the cat - Dog.

If Im gonna be a Lady Boy then damn it, why shouldnt my cat be a pussy pup?