Its only human nature

Everyone was cranky today. Dont believe it!

Usually we get on average 1 bad customer a day. And what I mean by bad are the kind of people who are really cranky or rude to you and wanna make you feel bad.

Today... I personally.. had three or four.

Mcanonymous said to me once after I told her about one customer "Who are these people? Ive never spoken or seen anyone speak to employees like that"

Yep, this is another one of my reacting-badly-to-a-misunderstanding rant.

Example:

Today. 3pm

"Can I have a small coleslaw please?"

"Sure. Any other salads?"

"No thank you"

*I go to get the container*

"That was the coleslaw, was it?"

"Yes, but it doesnt look like there is enough to make a full container. Is there anyway you can just give me whats left and discount it?"

"No, Im sorry. Salads are done by container. Meaning you pay for the container. What we can do is fill it up with another salad as well"

"Well, I dont want another salad. Cant you just discount it?"

"No Im sorry we cant. Because you pay for the container, not by weight"

"Fine!"

*She was irritated with me at this point, pulled her trolley away and disappeared. I sighed*

"Number 47?"

"Yeah right here mate!"

"Hi how can I help you?"

"Hey, Umm.. I was just after 200 grams of the -"

"EXCUSE ME! I SAID I WANTING SOMETHING ELSE!"

*Everyone looks at the woman I previously served now standing down the other end of the deli in the fish section*

"Im sorry! *literally red faced* What else would you like?"

"Fish"

*She points at it. Refusing to look at me*

"There you go. Im sorry. Have good afternoon"

*Scoffs and rolls her eyes as she very quickly snatches the package outta my hand and charges off*

I felt pretty bad.
Its not like I deliberately ignored her.

Do customers really think thats what we do? That we are giving you the wrong product, mishearing something, miscalculating things on purpose? Just to fuck with your head and make your life difficult?

Luckily for me Number 47 was a guy with his wife and kids and they saw the whole thing and did their best to boost my ego and compliment me on my service.

This rant isnt just for when you are being served.. I mean, anytime really... if someone does something wrong stop and think for a freaking minute - are they really doing it deliberately?

I remember my ex-girlfriend got all shitty at me one day because I took a photo of her. Then, she took it upon herself to my the rest of my day hell until I made her feel better.

Apparently saying "Im sorry" doesnt fix anything these days.

But making the 'guilty' member feel embarrassed/bad or worse than you does?

What the fuck Jeeves, just what the fuck.

OTHER NEWS!

I had lunch with the security guard. He is freaking awesome. He's into weights, motorbikes, women, philosophy and breast appreciation - So we have a lot in common.

I was introduced to him as a guy and he was a little thrown by that and so for the entire lunch he was trying to get me to admit to him I was a girl. Not in an evil way. He just wanted me to clarify. He'd already heard my situation from my manager.

I wanted to toy with him so I didnt tell him anything until he was getting desperate and his face was starting to go red and contort like something was being rammed up his ass.

He was curious. Bless him.

We talked about our girlfriends and what not and it was nice to have a blokey bloke to talk to.

He also said to me "It was just a little weird though because you give off two kind of messages. Like I can see your a girl but I can also see your a guy and I dont know what to believe"

A lot of people feel this way, Im gathering. I really dont mind at all. I wouldnt wanna change myself to make it all fit "this way" or "that way".

It was an interesting comment to go back to work with. As I scrubbed Satay from the plastic dividers I thought about identity and understanding yourself.

Ive progressed a lot in the past year. Rather rapidly when you think about it. Whether that is good or not I dont know.

Im 100% certain I wouldnt change any of my decisions.

Im not happy in a girls body. Its too different to my self perception. This isnt something you can "Grow to accept"

My body is changing in ways I dont want it to.

The thing that all transexuals seem to say is "My body and mind didnt match"

For myself, I never found that true. I thought "well.. its all me...so I cant say it doesnt match"

But its true. It doesnt match. Its like my perception of how Id be when I was older - Its a delusion that I havent come to accpet.

***** never felt like my name. But I responded because thats what people called me.

I didnt like the feminine traits in my face and body but I accepted it because its what the mirror showed me.

But when I day dreamed or slept I was always male. I even remember dreams I had as a kid where I was male (One dream was that all high achieving students got to be granted a wish at the end of the year. Being one of those students I wished to be a boy and the dream was about my first day as a boy. I was 10 when I had that dream)

Anyway, now Im just blabbering...so Ill wrap it up.

At first this problem seemed really foggy and larger than life but now... its a lot smaller and everything seems straight forward (as much as it can be).

I think one day my mother should read this because I dont know any other way to make her understand.

Sometimes you dont realise something until the last minute.
But as they say its never too late.

KUNI:
I have no idea. I havent seen that before. But... I think...its something like Rhyming (Rhyme) Slang.

Like we say "See you later, alligator", "Im going to use the dog-and-bone (Telephone)
There is no meaning, just it rhymes.

Actually, what you said didnt rhyme... but it was cute. So maybe its just a cute thing. I dont know. I seriously dont know...


FATALIST: Wait, let me get this straight (no pun intended) ... you came out to your mates AT a football game?

If thats the case then...

ARE YOU SUICIDAL?! I couldnt think of a more intimidating atmosphere to be open. It would be like me standing at a urinal and saying to the man next to me "You know, Im actually a little girl"

You've got balls, mate. I hope your friends realised that.

I dont think its a show of courage you admit to the world apart of yourself. Its nothing like courage at all. Stupidity is probably a better word.

There are times when you should keep it to yourself. And I dont want anyone to get all uptight about gay rights or whatever because thats just annoying...

I mean, on my bad days Im a NAMBLA supporting Neo-Nazi... but I dont go to Jewish run daycares and tell them. Thats just asking for it.

No, you know what I think is admirable - People who can hold there tongues. People who can put up with crap. People who pick there fights and know when to say something and when to shut up.

YEH~

Right on~!

Something tells me Im right off the mark with this one.. but whatever...

WAFFLES, gimme a hollar baby... people might beniefit from your cynical comments and sacastic commentary