Updates

Im trying to stay fit and healthy but its not working. I'll relapse every other day and have a bag of chips or something. Damn this crap being hard. Im shooting for 5kgs. Its a lot given how much I actually weight but I know Ill miss and lose only 2kgs or something so its all good.

Ive also got a amateur photo shoot coming up. I have been keeping my skin clean. Thats working out really well.

Ive stopped shaving my lip though because if i do, i seem to get a lot of acne.

The hair there isnt getting very thick still. Its rather wispy still.

Death favours the man who laughs at his jokes.

The wonderous Marco

It seems I opened up a new blog and whilst in the shower the cat decided to publish it for me... Cheers Marco.

Anyway I just wanted to pop in and mention again how weird it is for some of Mums friends to call me "He" and some to call me "She".

very amusing.

Oh and for the record my Mum still calls me "She". I think for the most part in public too.

More lively updates

OMG, did I miss batman begins?!

I totally heart batman. I would have loved to see it ... again.

Well, I am allowed to take my Provisional Permit test in a short while (2 weeks?). I'm stalling. Im just so darn scared, ok?

Im definitely not good enough to do VORT (which is an instant test resulting 99.9% of the time in an instant fail). So I will be doing CBT (Competency Based Training). The Dealio there is you go out on a certain number of drives and complete a list of 'skills'. Each one having to be done twice in order to prove your competency.

Ive entered in a bunch of car competitions and other competitions too. All hoping I can buy me a set of wheels.

My mum suggested that I stop T now that I have my voice. I was like n0 F^
Moment to make fun though;
Period? Really? It's called a Period...Doesnt that strike you as amusing a little?

Sorry, for someone that had horrific 'periods' (and I know another reader can agree with me). They are not so much periods are they are an era.

Yeh thats not going to be something I sign up for in a hurry.

That and my beard hasnt fully set in yet
I know Im totally going to regret it with the pain of shaving but I just have always wanted one!

Just for randomness sake I'll put my measurements up.

Oh first did I mention that my dick is now like 3cm something? That's like a 1cm growth in a year.

w00t w00t! PROGRESS!

Ok, now onto stats

Waist 74cm 30" (was 28")

Bust 89cm 35" (no idea what I was...shall we say...not a lot?)

Shoulder 41cm 16" (was 14")

More uneventfulness

Nothing is happening. Still no job.

Saw the new Harry Potter movie.
(Its improving from its previous slump of crap)

Listened to Interview with a Vampire by Anne rice (audiobook)
(It was crap)

Currently reading Lord of the Rings
(It's different... but possible crap too)

Gym is paying off as I have mentioned before. I look good. Or as Tony would say Grrrrrrrrrrrrreat!

My hair is getting long. My facial hair is still .. annoying and whispy.

I've got an interview tomorrow. God, I hope I get it. Its for one of those OnTheRun Subway places. Its close to my house (that's good!) but itll be night shifts (that's bad!) however it'll be good to be earning money (that's good!) but it means I'll be working in the food industry again (....that's bad)

PHOTO TIME!



As you can see Ive got some pecs now (under all the boobie fat..or Moobs as they are sometimes affectionately called). My shoulders are bigger.

Oh and be it known that Im embarrassed by both photos and it took a great deal of effort to put those feelings aside right now.

No news is good news

I've got the shrink again next week.

Nothing had changed really. My facial hair is still, duh, getting thicker and darker. Ive got more and more black hairs now on my chin but they piss me off.

I had a hormone drop (I think) because I suddenly felt really depressed but now its lifting.

Im tempted to blame the moon (because it feels like its coincides) but I wiki'd it and there seems to be no correlation.

Love and Peace to you all!

While the cats away...

Thanks for the kind words guys.

Dr Lyons went on in our last session that the only reason he only put me on the clinic because it'd be safer that letting me manage my own testosterone.

Which is a little against what he said the other time when surgery 'would have been in November [08]' .. or 09 .. i forget now.. anyway!

yeah so there seems to be these different dates and opinions coming out of the same mouth. Its... rather confusing.

My blood results came back and I have a Mid level for T and a high level (for a dude) of estrogen.

..but nothing seems to be being done about that.

When I got my injection it hurt in a different way. It felt ok to go in (which was the weird part) but this time it didnt burn down my leg, it hurt up my spine ish area. And I said "Ah, thats hurting"

and Rosie said "what kind?"
"burning. Like the pain when you have alcohol in a wound"
"Well, I use Iodine.. so maybe your just a wuss"

And its not the first time shes said such a thing to me. I get a little annoyed because its ... well, stupid dont you think?

Someone who has been oppressed by binary gender systems and a compulsory heterosexual society (ooo fancy words!) to then turn around and preach the same message.

Very odd.

But after I walked home pissed off I saw it from a different light.

We cant change the world to the way it should be (because I dont think we know yet how humans are 'suppose to be') so we have to do our best, which is, to conform.




So it seems to be the idea of the clinic that Im not trans and well, yeh its annoying I suppose. But I shrug at them... I know what I am.
I like what I am.


Oh some boasting here; all this gym work is paying off. Man I look Ho0o0OoT
Its just a damn shame I cant have chest surgery yet otherwise Id be parading around topless (more often).